Pope John Paul II Still The Anti-Christ, Evangelical Right Insists

15 JAN 2011

     Faith groups have been buzzing since Pope Benedict XVI's announcement yesterday that Pope John Paul II will be beatified, the last step before sainthood, this May.

     Despite his passing five years ago, the Evangelical Right continues their 3-decade-long tradition of insisting that he is the Anti-Christ.

     "I don't care what you say, he's still the Anti-Christ," said John White, 40, of West Virginia.  "I believed it for 33 years and I ain't gonna stop believin now.  Just because he's dead don't mean nothing.  He still said Buddhists and Gandhi and Muslims and Jews could maybe get to heaven, and that has 'Anti-Christ' written all over it. It's just like Left Behind.

     "1 John chapter 4 verses 2 to 3," he added, which identifies the anti-Christ as one who does not acknowledge Jesus as God in Flesh.

     This Catholic Onion reporter pointed out that Pope John Paul II pushed for perpetual adoration of the Eucharist, which is believed to be God enfleshed in Christ's Presence, in every Catholic parish in the world.

     Moreover, three verses after White's citation it reads, "Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God, but everyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love," which embodies Pope John Paul II's theology.

      "You just wait," said White's wife, Betty Jo, changing the subject.  "In 2012 the world's gonna end and that False Prophet is gonna be standing right next to Satan and the Muslims and the Catholics. It's just like Pat Robertson told them Catholic Haitians after that earthquake - they deserved it 'cuz they made a pact with the devil. Catholics and Muslims make pacts with the devil, and they made pacts with the pope, so that obviously means the pope is the devil."

     The announcement of Pope John Paul II's beatification followed the verified miraculous healing of Sister Marie-Simon-Pierre of Parkinsons Disease after she prayed for his intercession. The nun prayed for healing after four years of suffering, and awoke the following morning with all signs of the disease gone.

     "Even demons can heal people, Mark chapter 3 verse 22," said Gary, John's brother, citing when Pharisees accused Jesus of healing with the power of Satan.  "Could be he just pretended to die and now he's using his witchcraft.  Anyway, who even says this lady was healed?  Doctors with their un-Christian science?  I know one thing for sure, if the Catholic Church says it's true you know Satan's behind it. He's the Anti-Christ for sure, and this beety-cation proves it.

     "Robertson episode 113 line 52."

~*~